Spring is in the air...

I spent most of the day out with mom, showing her art stores that I thought she might have liked to see for pictures for her room, the dining room, and the kitchen. While I was out with Jennie once I saw a nice picture of a bowl of strawberries for only $10 (down from $35), and she liked it.

It was...hard, having to revisit some of the sites where Jennie and I went and hung out in. Like the last time and the first time she visited, there was a sense of emptiness there, a vibrant colour which was once there but now faded away. I have to now train myself to get out of the eager routine I fell in, calling up Jennie's room at the Delta Chelsea, and hearing Bonnie's bright and cheery voice, hurrying through the College Park shopping concourse, seeing my smiling Jennie coming up to hug me in the lobby.

I'm going to see her again -- I know I will, and once again we've gone back to our old routine on AIM. It'll take me a while to adjust, and it's gotten better with time, too. Still, I just can't help but feel this overwhelming sense of realizing that something wonderful and magical was once with me, and now just isn't there anymore.

The whole week was just a whirlwind for me. Between the emotional stress of having to try to keep mom happy, having to help Jordan take care of his maternal grandfather, and dealing with Bonnie's reaction to all of that plus being dropped back into Toronto, it was a miracle that I could still keep myself together to actually spend time with Jennie -- and even then I realized that a lot of important things fell through the cracks...like helping Katherine with Neena's move back to her apartment in Etobicoke.

(If you're reading this, Katherine...my God, I'm sorry. I tried to get back to you, but I just was either too exhausted or just simply had no time...but I did try to call you up last night and you weren't there...could we get together sometime soon?)

It's never easy, isn't it? But as Jennie told me, life would be pretty dull if it were, wouldn't it?