Got to find a reason/A reason things went wrong...

Never start no static/I just get it off my chest

Things are starting to get to a point where the pool of people I know with whom I can spend more than five minutes without getting grossly pissed off by them is growing smaller and smaller by the day; in the meantime, the block function in Adium is getting a serious workout. Unfortunately, Adium doesn't neatly organize all of my contacts who are blocked into a separate list the way Fire does. I've heard that Adium's upcoming 1.0 release is supposed to fix that though.

I've always been a stickler for classification and organization - chalk it up to being indoctrinated trained in the biological sciences. From my training and through my astute observations, I've been able to group the people in my life into various categories. Taxonomically speaking, I've used personality traits as my characters; maybe when I get around to it, I'll draw up a suitable tree.


It all comes back to you you're gonna get what you deserve/Try and test that you're bound to get served

Hence, this little running tally that I've made up in my head, in the hopes that maybe I'll learn from this little Rogue's Gallery I've assembled in my life - maybe I'll learn to avoid more people like these in the future, and keep them from getting their hooks into my life before it's too late. And so, here I present the first edition of the Ctenuchid's Personal Catalogue of Obnoxious People:

1) Arrogantus maximus - yes, dear, you have an opinion, and yes dear, you're entitled to it. But no, you're not entitled to berate and beat down people who disagree with you. And no, you're not entitled to yell and scream at me as if you seem to be right and I seem to be wrong without any regard whatsoever for what I have to say. Believe it or not, you don't know everything about everything, and while I'm sure you enjoy seeing me entertain your endless screeds with the nodding of my head...deep down inside, I'm not laughing with you, I'm laughing at you.

2) Expectus toomuchus - God knows I try to be a good person. I really do. But for some reason which I can't for the life of me ascertain and/or fathom, you seem to hold me to some insanely high standard of perfection to which I can't possibly live up to. And I think you know it. Newsflash: I make mistakes just like everyone else. Just like you. I tried to be patient with you when you did things I didn't like - I think it's only fair I be treated the same way.


3) Hypocritica doublestandardia - "This uniquely pernicious class of individual is usually characterized by a highly defensive reaction which appears to be evolutionarily optimized to deal maximum damage to individuals of the genus Ctenucha. The reason for this is unknown. The defensive reaction is known to be grossly disproportionately large compared to a stimulus which may be relatively benign in nature..."

- of course, you know I saved the best for last. What else can I say about someone who routinely twists my own words against me to mean the exact opposite of what I intended to say in the first place? And this of course, conveniently feeds your Martyrdom Complex which consistently puts you in the position of innocent victim and me in the position of vile evildoer. Go ahead, ask me another question, when you know that whatever I say, it'll be the wrong answer in your book, and I'll be in the wrong for answering it no matter what my answer is. If I give you the answer x you'll chastise me for it not being y. And when I give the answer y you'll say how I'm wrong for it because it's too much like x. Since when is friendship all about being part of an ego-stroking circle-jerk? That's more than just unfair. It's greedy and selfish.


3.1) subspecies Preferentia againstmeitia - this unique beast (the result of a potential hybridization event between the above and E. toomuchus) thinks it's perfectly fine for their friends to behave as badly as they want to, as poorly as they want to, and, yet, when presented with a hint of human imperfection from me, immediately leap down my throat telling me what an awful of horrible person I am, shoving my own mistakes down my throat like so much vomit at the dinner table. Never mind how badly their other friends have treated them. Do I get the benefit of the doubt like they do? How about a "Get Out of Jail Free" pass? Oh no. Naturally no. Of course, no.

And so gentle reader, thus endeth the lesson. Tune in next time when I update the Personal Catalogue to include university administration and faculty...